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Tuesday, June 24, 2008

You'll Be Drawing Back a Nub

Andy and I went to dinner last night with some business associates (of Andy's of course...my business associates were all in bed with their pacis and blankets sound asleep). We went to one of my favorite restaurants in the whole world which just happens to be a few miles from our house. The Wash House is a little shanty down by the bay with the best food you've ever had. I was so excited all day long yesterday that I fasted to make sure I had plenty of room for everything I was dreaming of.

I don't know what got into me but I turned practically violent when Andy suggested we share something. I ordered the soft shell crab and had to wipe the drool from my chin just saying the words. When I heard Andy say he was having the lamb but might have a bite of my crab I grabbed my fork, pointed it at him and said "Ya might want to get your own there pal and keep yer hands to yerself." Not really. But sort of. I was pretty hungry. And my hunger had made me angry. Obviously.

We had a wonderful dinner but I think I got paid back for my most uncooperative and uncharitable spirit when I stood up to go to the restroom and wiped out in the hallway just around the corner from our table. Wiped. Out. The heel of my shoe slipped out from under me and next thing I knew I was staring at the ceiling. Strangest thing though....no one saw me. Good thing I wasn't hurt or I might still be lying there. As it was I stood up, announced (to no one) that "I'm ok" and kept going.

Then it occurred to me later on that they might have a security camera. And they might have been really amused to see my gymnastics routine outside the bathroom. And horrified if they also recorded me threatening to stab my husband in the face with an eating utensil. So it's a good thing I enjoyed my dinner because it might be a while before I return.

At least without a disguise.

5 comments:

ArtcTrish said...

You make me miss some good ole gulf seafood! Theres nothing but Red Lobster and Cock of the Walk up here! Mmmmmm that sounded good...until the wipe out part. I feel your pain sistah, as i nearly wiped out on the altar at Easter service with communion in hand. I managed to keep from hitting the ground but proceded to throw Jesus all over the area. Truly- I feel your pain!

Mary Anna said...

Just so you know, I depend on you at about 7:30 a.m. everyday for my morning laugh. Today--huge success!

Colored With Memories said...

Still laughing.

Glad y'all got a night out.

Bird On A Wire said...

Gahhhhh I so miss being in Gulf Shores, living on the Redneck Riviera and being able to have good ole seafood any ole time..Been there, done that gymnastics thing...

WendyH said...

Julie, if you're curious...remind me to tell you about my one, and ONLY, experience at Washed Out...I mean the Wash House. If you're curious...