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Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Mayberry's Most Wanted

Just in case you see my picture in the post office....here's what happened. The other day I needed one stamp, just one, or so I thought. I was in a huge hurry so I pulled right in front of the post office where I could see the stamp machine just through the doors. I grabbed two quarters and ran inside to throw my money in the machine, grab my stamp and run right back to the car. I throw one quarter in, no problem. The second quarter though was a reject and kept getting spit back out. This routine went about 3 rounds before I'd had enough and I hit...no, tapped....ok, pounded.....the machine and all of a sudden lights and sirens start going off. I didn't even bother to look up and let the security camera get a good picture (I've seen COPS enough to know you never look up) before I ran out the door and jumped in the getaway car. The more I thought about it I think....and I didn't learn this in law school....but it's probably a crime to tamper with federal equipment or something to that effect??? Anyway....I suppose I could represent myself if need be but....is it still called pro se when you're an attorney and you represent yourself??? Just wondering.
Today I had to go to the post office and went inside to mail a package. I wore a long blonde wig and glasses. And carried the baby in with me. I'm happy to say I'm still free.
Oh...here's the real kicker. Turns out I had a whole bloomin' book of stamps in my purse the whole time. sheesh.

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