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Thursday, May 14, 2009

I'm Finished Now!

It's been a while since there's been any potty talk so here goes....

I'm trying to figure out at what point should my children be potty independent? As in....they no longer feel the need to announce what they are about to do and then sit there after they've done said deed and holler at the top of their lungs over and over..."I'm finished now!!!" And wait for me to come running and complete the job for them?

Not too long ago as one of them...I won't mention any names but he's the oldest....was sitting there hollering at me that he was finished....I walked to the door and told him in no uncertain terms that he was a big boy and I will no longer be assisting him in that area, metaphorically speaking. He threw his head back, let out a tremendously frustrated wail and hollered "Noooooooooooo!!!!!!!!"

What in the world??

I didn't ask him to pluck out his eyelashes. To rip off his fingernails. Or even to clean his room. It was just a simple request. To WIPE HIS OWN BUTT!!!! Come on!

I've been changing diapers and wiping butts for nearly SIX years non-stop, people. SIX years. So here's the deal..... If your legs are long enough for your feet to touch the floor when you're sitting on the pot, you're big enough to do the deed yourself in its entirety. Know what I mean?

I thought I'd made progress because this particular nameless individual went into the bathroom without making any public service announcements first, and shortly thereafter I heard a flush and realized that I'd not been beckoned to assist. I was pleased. So I continued cleaning up the kitchen with a proud smile on my face until he ran into the den, buck naked and yelled "Hey Mama....(as he turned around and leaned over)....did I get it all?????"

AAARRGGHHHHH

I'm finished now!!!!!!!!!!

2 comments:

Emily Mangual said...

I have been following your stories for some time now from a link on my cousin's blog. Often your posts leave in tears from laughing. This particular post is no exception.

I have been changing diapers for nearing twelve years with no break. Four of those years, I had two in diapers. One would think a mother of five would have more skill toilet training. My only son (age five), my fourth child, is trained in the sense that he no longer wears diapers or Pull-ups, not even at night. However, he also makes loud proclamations wherever we are when nature calls. Once on the john, he gives us play by play information of the type of poop. Sometimes it is dinosaur poo, sometimes astronaut, and others, snake poop. We often hear chuckling from the other side of public restroom stalls. It is always a thirty to forty-five minute process. He is also averse to cleaning his own backside.

So thank you for sharing. It is comforting to know that I am not alone in the trenches.

Mary Anna said...

I think the poop stories are my favorite. ;) Hope you and the fam are well!