Upside Down Mom is Wow

I have a pair of slippers and a robe that have "MOM" monogrammed on them. When I sit in my bathroom and dry my hair (on the rare occasion I'm actually able to take a shower and wash my hair) and look at those letters they say "WOW" (because I'm looking at them upside down, see). So this morning was one of those few and far between days. A lucky day. And I was thinking to myself....WOW is right. WOW~I'm actually going to be showered and dressed and ~dare I believe~ even have on makeup before 8 am. And to make things better, everyone was still asleep. Lucky lucky me. Wow.

So I came upstairs to get a cup of coffee where I was greeted by William, who was walking as if he'd just hopped off a large horse after a long ride, and told me that he tee-tee'd "just a little bit" in his top bunk but it was ok because "it will dry." I just love changing that top bunk. Wow, I couldn't wait.

Then we heard Catherine raffling around in her room and when I went in to get her discovered she had been lying in a small pond in her bed. Luvs....with leakguard...didn't guard so well last night. As I'm getting her changed and dried off, William was sitting in her floor dismantling a flashlight. "Mama," he said, "I'll be right back....I just need to go wash these batteries."

???????

All of a sudden I realized the batteries must have been corroded so, as he's dripping battery acid all the way to the bathroom, I chased him down to throw them away and get him to wash his hands. He wanted to know why. "Because they are corro...I mean....it's ac....I mean....BECAUSE I SAID SO." Wow.

Off and running back to Catherine's room to get some pants on her. But she beat me to it and decided to wear her Dora big girl panties. "You HAVE to use the potty if you wear these...do you understand?" Uh-huh, she said. Right. She's never used the potty...why in the world is she going to start today? But remembering I had thought it was a lucky day a little earlier, I thought there might be a chance.

No chance though. As I headed in to Stuart's room where...you guessed it....I had yet another diaper to change....Catherine came toddling in as if she'd just finished her ride on Trigger and announced "Dora wet. Wet wet wet."

ARGH!!! "Catherine," I said, "you were supposed to use the potty, remember?"

"Uh-huh. I tee tee ovuh deah."

"Where?"

"Deah, Mama. Wheah de clotes ah."

A giant puddle in the closet to clean. A pile of sheets to launder. And battery acid to mop up. All before my first cup of coffee.

WOW.