In Style

She wore her Dora slippers to school for pictures on Friday. Because her foot "huhts." I think she just wanted to make a fashion statement.

Looks like she was making some other kind of statement to William in the first picture. Probably telling him his shoes were all wrong.

They really do love each other. Sometimes they do this for a photo op. Other times it's completely spontaneous. Either way, it's just plain sweet.

In Conclusion

So here is what I decided after our week at the beach had come to an end. Much too soon I might add. It was a lot of work to get there, and yes there were a few obstacles along the way. But as is the common theme in raising kids....the good always outweighs the bad.

My vacation came in unexpected moments that will be remembered long after the sand is brushed out of my bags. Moments like....the surprise and excitement in William's face on his 4th birthday as he blew out the candle on the big number 4 stuck in his cheapo grocery store giant chocolate chip cookie cake he thought was the coolest thing ever. Being able to play, romp with and hug on our babies without being sidetracked by yardwork, housework, and work work. Having a reason to lie down every afternoon with the two little ones and nap, knowing that there was nothing more important anywhere I needed to be doing. Not making a bed all week. Finally having time to sit down and figure out the fancy camera I got for Christmas....and having the most beautiful subjects in the world to practice on. Here are just a few of my favorites from the week.

We are already looking forward to next year. But next time I think we'll check the status of the A/C before we unpack. But then again our troubles did buy us an extra night. And an extra nap. A few more moments in the sun. Too bad the toilets didn't overflow or the stove catch on fire. We might still be there. Of course now that I've jinxed us....it will probably happen next year.

Maybe then we'll get those T-shirts they promised us.

Part II

Ok. Where were we? Oh yes....we had "moved" from the hot condo to the cool one. And the littlest ones and I made it back to join the others and resume our vacation. So Andy had moved a few more things that we needed into our new digs, so we had a few things here and a lot of things there. And then we got a phone call from the rental office. Andy came into the bedroom where I was looking for Catherine's other shoe so we could head down to the pool, assuming it was probably roasting in the hot condo, and he said "We gotta move."

Thinking it was a "let's roll" kind of comment, I assured him I was moving as fast as possible.

"No. We gotta MOVE. Condos."

"Oh. They got the A/C fixed?"

"No. But we can't stay here because the owners are coming back. So we have to move to the condo across the hall."

Silence.

"BUT...(he continued)...they said they would send someone to help us. AND...they are sending up T-shirts for the kids."

Silence. Then: "@&*(!& Kidding me! !U&*(#* @&*@ T-shirts???? @*()!()*@(* #^&*@%^& Seriously. T-shirts???? !%^^&%!%^&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (Yes, I have been known to have potty mouth. This was one of those times. But since I've had kids I spell out my potty words. And fortunately my kids can't spell yet. But the people next door to us probably could and for that I'm a little embarrassed.)

"Calm down, Queen. I told them T-shirts won't exactly cut it. So they are giving us a free night."

Well the move to our third (and final) resting place wasn't so bad since they did as they promised and sent help. Although we still had to pack everything up. AND go retrieve everything we had left in the first condo. But by Wednesday we were settled in and started to really enjoy our vacation.

And as for Catherine? She was feeling MUCH better. Cough was gone. Antibiotics worked fast. But does anyone know what antibiotics do to a child's digestive tract? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Antibiotics are wonderful in that they knock out the original ailment and leave in its place....diarrhea. Pools, swim diapers and diarrhea. Not a pretty combination. But God took mercy on us and let us dodge that bullet every time. I would put two swim diapers on her, watch her every 5 minutes to make sure we weren't going to be faced with a mudslide (sorry...I do realize that's gross but I don't know how else to say it) and we managed to stay clean every time we went swimming.

Our luck was starting to turn. More later.

Vacation?

We have returned. You wouldn't believe our week if I told you, which of course I will. But you won't believe it. You will think I'm making it up. But I'm not. I am, however, so exhausted at the moment that I can hardly form coherent thoughts so I may have to do this in a series. Let's start with Vacation Part I.

We left last Sunday to travel a whole hour away to the sandy white beaches South(east?) of Mayberry. Remember I told you how much stuff I had packed? Well we managed to cram it into the van. We arrived, checked in to our lovely condo, parked in the garage and managed to load up two carts and schlep up the elevator with all kids, the stroller, and both carts in tow. We opened the door to our very beautiful, albeit very warm home away from home. Hmmm....must have had the A/C turned way up since no one was here. We'll just crank it down to 60, unload EVERYTHING....notice I said EVERYTHING....and head down to the pool for a couple of hours. When we return it will be nice and cool.

WRONG! When we returned it was still a balmy 78 degrees in the condo, although this time we had three starving, screaming, whining children. I was grabbing food out of the pantry and throwing it to them like peanuts to the elephants at the zoo. Chips, yogos, anything I could find to keep them calm while the maintenance men checked out our "little" problem. Sorry folks, Brutus said. We're going to have to move you to another condo because we can't get this thing up and running tonight. He might as well have said "I'll have to throw a pot of boiling water on you, Ma'am. Hope that will be alright with you." Ok. Fine. Regroup. Get a plan. Feed the kids. Grab some clothes and head to the other condo until they can get this thing fixed tomorrow.

So we, along with just a portion of our transport, headed up 7 stories to sleep in a cool condo. Where sleep was nothing more than a tease when we were awakened at 2 am to Catherine "barking" from her bedroom. Anyone who has ever been through the croup knows what I mean by barking. Of course as soon as we awoke, so did William, then so did Stuart. And of course Stuart was looking for the milkman so I sent Andy to sit with Catherine in a steamed up bathroom while I fed the baby. We then spent the next few hours listening to Catherine wheeze and cough, wondering if we were going to have to get this child with only one good lung to the hospital. We made it through the night though, so first thing the next morning I loaded up the two littlest ones, including the sick one, to head back to our Dr.

Turns out she had a lung infection. Five hours, a chest x-ray, and 10 days worth of antibiotics later the three of us were headed back to the beach to resume our vacation. Got a call from Andy just before we left telling me the A/C was not fixed, so he was loading up a few more items to move from the hot to the cool condo and would meet me there. And....since I was at home...could I bring our cast iron skillet and some steak seasoning, along with some zip loc bags for snacks for the kids at the pool? Oh...some chip clips too.

I can't believe I had forgotten the cast iron skillet.

To be continued.

You Did WHAT In My Floor?

Well I've been packing all day for our beach trip. Notice I didn't say loading the car. Just packing. Whether we will actually take everything I've packed remains to be seen. But that's not my problem. Not because I don't want it to be my problem, it's just that I'm no good at it. It's Andy's area of expertise. The man can work miracles when it comes to packing. He once got 8 dining room chairs in the back of an SUV. This skill, coupled with his cheap...I mean....frugal nature....allowed him to move the entire furnishings of our home two moves ago in one of those tiny U-haul trailers...you know...the ones that say "RENT ME for $9.99?" That entire move over 250 miles only cost $27.00, including gas. But I digress.

Trying to pack for a week long trip with two preschoolers under foot is like shoveling snow in a snowstorm. Raking leaves during a typhoon. Blowing up an air mattress with a hole in it. You get the picture. I would pack something, they would pull it out. I would open a cabinet in the kitchen, they would drag everything out. I'd put it back up, they would put something else back to replenish that spot on the floor with a random item. At one point in the kitchen I was stepping over a large Dora doll, about 30 zip loc bags, a Buzz Lightyear flashlight, an open container of Animal Crackers, a handful of raisins and Tina Turner.

I went looking for Andy to see if he could herd the cats outside or rent them to some gypsies for a few hours. I walked into my bedroom only to see a huge pile of...what I thought to be....DOG poop. In the middle of my bedroom floor! GROSS. Under my breath I'm saying "that !&*@ DOG" as Andy says "Look what your daughter did." About that time I realized that the !%^&@ dog had been at the kennel for two hours already. WHAT IN THE WORLD????? I found Catherine, sure 'nuf, running around sans diaper.

"Cath-e-rine. Did you poop in Mommy and Daddy's floor?"

"Ah-huh!" she stated very proudly.

"No, Ma'am. No poo poo in floor. Poo poo in potty! Not the floor. Good grief. Do you understand me?"

She just stared at me. Then she grabbed a fist full of raisins from the middle of the kitchen floor and crammed them in her mouth. Just what I wanted to see from someone who runs around with no diaper on.

Like our Jersey friends say....Whaddya gonna do?

We're Moving

Bet that got your attention. Actually it only looks like we're moving. To the North Pole. For at least a year. To one of those research stations. Where we will only get a flight in to drop off some butter and bananas once the whole time.

We're really going to the beach for a week. An hour away. In quite a civilized place where they have grocery stores, drugstores and even a Pizza Hut with delivery services. We're staying in a very nice place with a washer and dryer. It is possible that if we don't take something with us, we can probably get it there. And if we run out of clothes, we can wash and dry them there. But for some reason I felt compelled to go to Sam's the other day and buy everything in bulk to take with us. Including enough diapers to keep the McCaughey septuplets dry for six months.

For some reason I felt it necessary to buy (with the intention of transporting with us) 12 pounds of butter, 3 pounds of bacon, 60 sausage links, 5 pounds of lunch meat, 5 pounds of cheese, 4 pounds of mustard, 72 waffles, 10 bags of chips, 100 slim jims, 4 loaves of bread, 12 packages of graham crackers, 460 diapers and a bucket of margarita mix (hey...who put that in my cart???). Oh....and enough laundry detergent for 320 loads.

**Thumbs up!**

We also have to take the pack-n-play, portable high chair, portable potty, jumpy seat, bumbo seat, reclining travel stroller, double stroller, umbrella stroller and exersaucer. (Deep breath) Stuart's floaty seat, Catherine's floaty seat, William's kickboard and various and sundry beach and pool toys. Special pillows, special blankets, Tina Turner and Spiderman. Oh....and William's birthday is next week so we also have to take all of his gifts to open. AND...let's not forget about clothes. Thank goodness swimsuits don't take up much room (except for mine. It's very big).

Considering the fact that every spare corner of the van is already filled with carseats, leaving us about enough room as it is for only a pack of crackers and a pair of socks for each person, I have no earthly idea where we are going to put everything.

Do they rent out Greyhound buses? I may need to check on that tomorrow.

Reality Show

I've decided that I like theory better than reality. See, you can lie in bed at night, thinking of the day ahead, and in THEORY it's going to be a productive day that leaves you with a real sense of accomplishment. But in reality, at the end of the next day as you lie in bed you are going to feel like a long armed tree sloth that didn't serve much of any purpose except to maybe hold the branches on the tree. Such is my day, most every day, since I've been a stay at home Mom. I manage to hold all the branches up but seem to make no real contribution to the jungle.

For instance. I lie in bed and in my mind have my to do list for the next day. It looks something like this:
-Rise early and have quiet, personal time before kids wake up
-Enjoy first AND second cup of coffee. In peace.
-Read Bible and get prayed up to arm self with grace, mercy and patience (and extra patience for Catherine)
-Apply facial mask, shower, wash and condition hair, loofah dead skin off, moisturize, moisturize, moisturize, apply makeup, dress and put on perfume
-Wake up beautiful children with a kiss and a song and the smell and sound of sizzling bacon
-Feed children hearty breakfast before "creative arts" session
-Dress cooperative children and lead them to table spread with arts and crafts supplies where they will make cute sock puppets and rehearse puppet show they will put on for after dinner entertainment
-Make out menu and grocery list for month
-Season pot roast and put in crock pot along with new potatoes and baby carrots for healthy dinner for family
-Launder clothes, stopping to add fabric softener mid-cycle so children and husband will smell Downy fresh
-Organize children's closets and pull out all out of season clothes to take to consignment shop to make extra money as contribution to family budget
-Dust wood blinds, baseboards and ceiling fans, gently removing family of dust bunnies before they request carrot cake for dessert
-Give dog a much needed bath, brush her teeth with tiny rubber brush that fits over finger, brush her hair, and clip her nails before leading her to nice clean bed and crate that has been cleaned out and disinfected
-Look over appointment book and call Dr's, Dentists, and Vet to schedule appointments for checkups, teeth cleanings and rabies shots, keeping straight who goes where and gets what
-Freshen up and put on lipstick to greet husband with a smile as lighting candles for lovely dinner family will appreciate, savor and compliment, saying "mmm, mmm" with each bite
-Enjoy puppet show

Here's my reality. As in, what I actually get done that day:

-Quick prayer: Dear God, HELP!
-Burn throat shooting coffee as if it was Tequila (uh, not that I know anything about that....just guessing)
-Change out empty roll of toilet paper before having to use any more pages from Martha Stewart Living
-Hit repeat on Wiggly Wiggly World for 97th time
-Greet dog catcher, once again, at door with dog who ran away because she hasn't been fed or watered in a month
-Smell laundry to determine level of salvageability from mildew after being left in washer for couple of days, and decide to try to dry anyway, tossing in half a box of dryer sheets to mask the smell
-Fix platter of dry toast for dinner
-Fall into bed, exhausted, and make to do list for tomorrow

And the thing is, I will not have STOPPED all day long! But what's funny is....if anyone ever calls my house at any time of the day, as the kids are screaming and fighting in the background, the baby is howling at the top of his lungs and the circus theme song is playing (ya-da-dadada-da-da-da-da-da), I will invariably pick up the phone, sweetly say "He-llooooo??" and when asked what I'm doing say "Nothing, nothing at all."

??????

Well I'm off to accomplish at least one task on my list for today and put on deodorant. At least under one arm. Maybe I'll get to the other one tomorrow. Wish me luck.